Student Rabbi Koach Baruch Frazier: Rosh Hashanah Day 2 5783
Rosh Hashanah Day 2 5783
September 27, 2022
Shanah Tovah!
We are officially in 5783, the beginning of the next Shmita cycle. And according to Chatam Sofer, the preeminent leader of Judaism in the Austro-Hungarian Empire during the first part of the 19th century, the beginning of the next Yovel (Jubilee) cycle. I did the math just to be sure and I think that he is correct! We have a chance not only to think about what release looks like in the next six years, but also the next 48!
In the last few years here at Kol Tzedek, we have collectively been looking at and working towards a world and a Philadelphia that has abolition as its foundation. We have been learning together about the external and internal facets of this new world we want to live in and are co-creating together. With the help of the KT for Black Lives committee, we have studied the Breathe Act together, getting ourselves acquainted with what is possible when Black folks have what they need to live and thrive. We also read adrienne maree brown's book, We Will Not Cancel Us, which centered some of the internal work that is necessary for us to move through the interpersonal conflict that will arise among us, because we are human. The deep dive that we have been taking has allowed us to push beyond our comfort zones towards our growing edges. These not-so-sexy endeavors are what's gonna get us to the other side of racial capitalism and the individualism that created this balagan that we are in today. But let's remember, things haven't always been this way nor do they have to stay this way! We have the opportunity, through teshuva, to change how we interact with each other in the face of harm that comes from us as well as the harm that comes at us.
While you may be familiar with the steps of teshuva laid out by the Rambam, today I want to explore with you some other sources that might give us a different take and perhaps some fresh insight into this lifelong project of turning towards our best selves. We'll begin our journey in the Tanakh with our biblical foreparents, stop by and learn with our medieval ancestors, and end up with some present-day Torah from Rabbi Danya Ruttenberg.
The prophet Yirmiyahu, Jeremiah, in chapter three, verse twenty two says:
שׁ֚וּבוּ בָּנִ֣ים שׁוֹבָבִ֔ים אֶרְפָּ֖ה מְשׁוּבֹתֵיכֶ֑ם
Return, rebellious children, I will heal your rebellion.
Now this is not the rebellion that will overthrow the racial capitalist system that needs to go, this is the rebellious spirit that despite folks calling you into teshuva, you remain where you are, immovable like that tree planted by the water. What I love about this verse is it uses the framework of healing for this movement from missing the mark to teshuva. This is not just about repair and accountability, it is about our actual healing of the harm that was brought into this world through our actions. What would it mean to begin our movement towards each other with the foundational understanding that the point, really, is to do our best to heal the harm. What I hear Jeremiah telling us is that being accountable to each other is a huge part of the healing and care work that we do in community. Just like other healing work that we do,it has the possibility of sustaining and nourishing us, keeping ourselves and our communities whole.
Now, we know that healing is different for everyone and the process that one moves through to get the kind of healing they need is subject to change throughout the healing journey. And to be sure, the healing that I am speaking of is that which brings a greater sense of wholeness and liberation, both of which are our birthright. We have inherited a legacy of knowing deep down in our bones that being free in our bodies, minds, and spirits, because we are whole just the way we are, is in fact the truth of who we are, no matter the oppressive forces that try their darndest to impinge upon us. In fact, I believe that because of these oppressive forces, we often forget to access our humanity and dignity when it comes to teshuva. We can lose focus of the healing mechanisms that are available to us to help us make it through the inevitable conflict that arises. 🎶 Loosen, loosen baby. Slow down, child slow down. 🎶 Everything ain't gotta be a fight. But if a fight ensues, know that it doesn't have to stay that way.
שׁ֚וּבוּ בָּנִ֣ים שׁוֹבָבִ֔ים אֶרְפָּ֖ה מְשׁוּבֹתֵיכֶ֑ם
Return, rebellious children, I will heal your rebellion.
Return to the state of being where you are in your dignity. Return to the part of you that allows the divine spark in you to touch the divine spark in those you are in conflict with. Return to what is possible when you lean into what is true about you. Prophet Jeremiah came to remind us that this greater sense of wholeness and liberation is what we are returning to. That is what it means to shuv.
🎶 Healing is possible, may it be so, because shuva is happening, may it be so, and we believe what we need most are the hearts of each other right here. 🎶
Yes, healing is possible through teshuva, but how do we move towards it? How do we maintain it once we touch it? Here's where our medieval ancestors come through.
In his book Hegyon Hanefesh Ha'atzuvah, Meditations of the Sad Soul, Rabbi Abraham bar Chiyya, a 12th-century Spanish philosopher, astrologer, and mathematician, gives us seven ways to understand the root of the word teshuva, shuv שוב.
1. Shuv can mean physically turning from one path or mentally turning from one notion to another, as in Kohelet 12:7:
וְיָשֹׁ֧ב הֶעָפָ֛ר עַל־הָאָ֖רֶץ
And the dust returns to the ground.
Sometimes in the process of teshuva, you need to physically make a change in the situation. Moving the energy can be an important way to get through. Try changing rooms or chairs or clothes or shoes. Maybe you exercise, or simply stretch. If you are inside, move outdoors, or vice versa. Breathe different air. Or as the proof text suggests, return to the earth--sit down, stand upon, grab some dirt--let the adamah be with its beloved adam for some Mother Earth wisdom and balance. We can get stuck in the thick of it and not allow ourselves the space and time to let go of the energy that keeps us from moving towards the healing power of teshuva. Make a shuni, or as Michael Jackson says, you gotta make that change!
2. Shuv can mean reversing or restoring, as in Tehillim 85:2:
רָצִ֣יתָ יְהֹוָ֣ה אַרְצֶ֑ךָ שַׁ֝֗בְתָּ (שבות) [שְׁבִ֣ית] יַעֲקֹֽב׃
HaShem, You will favor Your land, restore Jacob's fortune.
To restore is to regain something that has been lost or taken away. Often when we are in conflict, we lose ourselves in the pain, the grief, and the uncertainty of what will come next. This can lead to what Resmaa Menachem calls "dirty pain," which is the pain of avoidance, blame, or denial that causes us to respond from our most wounded parts. But the good news is that there are ways to regain our dignity and humanity. Our good, flawed selves are capable of acting with "clean pain." Clean pain, Resmaa says, is about choosing integrity over fear. It is about letting go of what is familiar but harmful, finding the best parts of ourselves, and making a leap with no guarantee of safety or praise. But Resmaa makes it clear that this healing does not happen in our heads. It happens in our body. Now is a good time to get clear about when those feelings of trauma and pain are happening now and when they are touching an old, yet fresh wound that is coming up for healing. Restore your connection with your body.
3. Shuv can mean giving, paying, exchanging, as in Melakhim Bet | 2 Kings 3:4:
וּמֵישַׁ֥ע מֶֽלֶךְ־מוֹאָ֖ב הָיָ֣ה נֹקֵ֑ד וְהֵשִׁ֤יב לְמֶֽלֶךְ־יִשְׂרָאֵל֙ מֵאָה־אֶ֣לֶף כָּרִ֔ים וּמֵ֥אָה אֶ֖לֶף אֵילִ֥ים צָֽמֶר׃
Now King Mesha of Moab was a sheep breeder; and he used to pay as tribute to the king of Israel a hundred thousand lambs and the wool of a hundred thousand rams.
Teshuva doesn't have to be a one way street. When we engage in the teshuva process, we have the opportunity to exchange energy, which is exactly what happens when we pay for something. When I am in clean pain mode, exchanging what I am feeling, what I am holding, how what is happening is affecting me, becomes possible. It is not so much of a task as it is a chance to actually engage in giving and receiving. Not only can I give my testimony and maybe even feedback, I can find within me the courage to listen to the testimony and feedback of this other good and flawed human or humans.
4. Shuv can mean resting or dwelling, as in Tehilim 23:6:
אַ֤ךְ ׀ ט֤וֹב וָחֶ֣סֶד יִ֭רְדְּפוּנִי כׇּל־יְמֵ֣י חַיָּ֑י וְשַׁבְתִּ֥י בְּבֵית־יְ֝הֹוָ֗ה לְאֹ֣רֶךְ יָמִֽים׃ {פ}
Only goodness and steadfast love shall pursue me all the days of my life, and I shall dwell in the house of the HaShem for many long years.
One thing that isn't so easy to do when in conflict with others is to stop and dwell, even for a little while. The tendency is to push forward with the help of the anxiety, the adrenaline, and the urgency that is within us. The first thing that Resmaa says that we need to do when we are in this state is to soothe ourselves, to quiet our minds, calm our hearts, and settle our bodies. He goes on to say that this is the part where you quiet your mouth and you don't say anything no matter how much you want to say it.
You just breathe.
You put down anything that you're holding, and you find the internal resource that your body experiences as safe, soothing, or pleasurable.
You. Slow. Things. Down.
This might take a while and that is okay. Imagine that you are giving yourself a little Shabbat where you can just be with what is before you move to the next thing.
5. Shuv can mean cleaving, not turning aside, as in יְשַׁעְיָהוּ Isaiah 57:17:
בַּעֲוֺ֥ן בִּצְע֛וֹ קָצַ֥פְתִּי וְאַכֵּ֖הוּ הַסְתֵּ֣ר וְאֶקְצֹ֑ף וַיֵּ֥לֶךְ שׁוֹבָ֖ב בְּדֶ֥רֶךְ לִבּֽוֹ׃
For their sinful greed I was angry; I struck them and turned away in My wrath. Though stubborn, they follow the way of their hearts.
Teshuva, returning to your best self allows a chance to remain faithful to the truth of our being. We can cling to our values, our principles, and our dignity as they are what gives us the courage and determination to be in right relationship with ourselves and each other. Sometimes in the midst of it all, we can forget that we have them...that is the truth of being human. AND yet, Mishlei | Proverbs 3:13-18 says:
Happy is the person who finds wisdom, The one who attains understanding.
Her value in trade is better than silver, Her yield, greater than gold.
She is more precious than rubies; All of your goods cannot equal her.
In her right hand is the length of days, In her left, riches and honor.
Her ways are pleasant ways, And all her paths, peaceful.
She is a tree of life to those who grasp her, And whoever holds on to her is happy.
What is this wisdom that we are holding onto? Well, in the Torah we have plenty to choose from: We can learn from the lives of Avraham, Sarah, and Hajar, as we did yesterday, from Ya'akov and Esav and of course from our transcestor Yosef and their brothers. The Talmud gives us much to ponder with all of the discussions and disagreements. Who can read the heartbreaking story of Reish Lakish and Rabbi Yochanan and not understand that we are in a long line of humans really needing the healing power of teshuva? But, Baruch HaShem, we also have a legacy of wisdom in the Torah of our lives and in this community. We hold onto these stories, those past and present, learning what to do and most often, what NOT to do.
6. Shuv can mean comfort or dwell in security, as it says in Tehilim 23:3:
נַפְשִׁ֥י יְשׁוֹבֵ֑ב יַֽנְחֵ֥נִי בְמַעְגְּלֵי־צֶ֝֗דֶק לְמַ֣עַן שְׁמֽוֹ׃
She settles my life; It guides me in righteous paths for the sake of Their name.
When we think about teshuva, comfort might not be the first thing that comes to mind, but this, too, is possible as a way into and through the process. What are the ways your mind, body, and spirit are comforted? Is there a song, a movement, a poem, a flower, a scent, a person that you can call to mind or interact with in person that will support you in your return? It is important to know what soothes and settles your body. You are going to need it for that next conflict you find yourself in.
7. Shuv can mean repenting when one misses the mark, as in Hoshea 14:2:
שׁ֚וּבָה יִשְׂרָאֵ֔ל עַ֖ד יְהֹוָ֣ה אֱלֹהֶ֑יךָ כִּ֥י כָשַׁ֖לְתָּ בַּעֲוֺנֶֽךָ׃
Repent, O Israel, to HaShem your God, for you have fallen because of your missing the mark.
Here is the form of teshuva that we would expect. But as Rabbi Ari Lev said yesterday, it is a hard word to translate into English. There are so many ways to understand it. But what I think is important about it is that it's a process. It doesn't just mean saying sorry, or just feeling remorse, or giving back something that was stolen. It involves all of that and more. Which is why I am so excited for these tools our ancestors gifted us, mapping out this process that can often feel overwhelming.
At the end of all of this, you might still be wondering, what the heck is teshuva and how will I do this in the next ten days, the next six or forty-eight years?! What is the ikar, the essence of this practice that we sometimes begrudgingly engage ourselves in?
This is where my teacher and friend Rabbi Danya Ruttenberg comes in. In her new book, On Repentance and Repair: Making Amends in an Unapologetic World, she describes what we are getting ourselves into. She says:
"The work of repentance is often described in terms that place heavy demands on the harmdoer (which is all of us, at different times, in different ways). But that doesn't mean that it can't also be gentle.
"The reason to do repentance work is not because you are BAD BAD BAD until you DO THESE THINGS but because we should care about each other, about taking care of each other, about making sure we're all OK. Taking seriously that I might have hurt you--even inadvertently! even because I wasn't at my best!--is an act of love and care. It is an opportunity to open my heart wider than it has been, to let in more empathy, more curiosity about how my choices or knee-jerk reactions have impacted you, have impacted others. To care about others' perspectives. To let your experience matter, deeply, to me. To look at another person--or a community, or a team of people--and say: Where are you? What are you feeling and experiencing now, and how might I have (even unwittingly) brought you pain or difficulty? And to care about making that as right as I can. It's an act of concern. To face the harm that I caused is an act of profound optimism. It is a choice to grow, to learn, to become someone who is more open and empathetic, who learns."
Teshuva is an act of concern and care that has the ability to heal our wounded souls. To make our communities a place where all of us can live and thrive. We can do this! In the next six years, see if you can identify one thing, one person, one conflict that you are wanting to focus on. Take the time to learn about yourself, understanding which way you want to turn, how you are going to restore your dignity, determining the healthy energy exchanges that will support your process, when and how you will rest throughout, whose wisdom will be your guide, and what are the comforting supports that you will need as you engage in repentance.
In the next forty-eight years, we have a chance to create a Jubilee that will not only release the land and debts, but, through the healing process of teshuva, create a world that is ripe for the liberation, abolition, and justice that we deserve.
May teshuva's healing power bless you, may it protect you, and may it help you know your wholeness.
G'mar Chatima Tovah.
Shanah Tovah.
🎶 Return to me, return to me
With every breath
Return
End and begin with me
With every breathe, return 🎶
🎶 הֲשִׁיבֵנוּ ה' אֵלֶיךָ וְנָשׁוּבָה. חַדֵּשׁ יָמֵינוּ כְּקֶדֶם: 🎶
September 27, 2022
Shanah Tovah!
We are officially in 5783, the beginning of the next Shmita cycle. And according to Chatam Sofer, the preeminent leader of Judaism in the Austro-Hungarian Empire during the first part of the 19th century, the beginning of the next Yovel (Jubilee) cycle. I did the math just to be sure and I think that he is correct! We have a chance not only to think about what release looks like in the next six years, but also the next 48!
In the last few years here at Kol Tzedek, we have collectively been looking at and working towards a world and a Philadelphia that has abolition as its foundation. We have been learning together about the external and internal facets of this new world we want to live in and are co-creating together. With the help of the KT for Black Lives committee, we have studied the Breathe Act together, getting ourselves acquainted with what is possible when Black folks have what they need to live and thrive. We also read adrienne maree brown's book, We Will Not Cancel Us, which centered some of the internal work that is necessary for us to move through the interpersonal conflict that will arise among us, because we are human. The deep dive that we have been taking has allowed us to push beyond our comfort zones towards our growing edges. These not-so-sexy endeavors are what's gonna get us to the other side of racial capitalism and the individualism that created this balagan that we are in today. But let's remember, things haven't always been this way nor do they have to stay this way! We have the opportunity, through teshuva, to change how we interact with each other in the face of harm that comes from us as well as the harm that comes at us.
While you may be familiar with the steps of teshuva laid out by the Rambam, today I want to explore with you some other sources that might give us a different take and perhaps some fresh insight into this lifelong project of turning towards our best selves. We'll begin our journey in the Tanakh with our biblical foreparents, stop by and learn with our medieval ancestors, and end up with some present-day Torah from Rabbi Danya Ruttenberg.
The prophet Yirmiyahu, Jeremiah, in chapter three, verse twenty two says:
שׁ֚וּבוּ בָּנִ֣ים שׁוֹבָבִ֔ים אֶרְפָּ֖ה מְשׁוּבֹתֵיכֶ֑ם
Return, rebellious children, I will heal your rebellion.
Now this is not the rebellion that will overthrow the racial capitalist system that needs to go, this is the rebellious spirit that despite folks calling you into teshuva, you remain where you are, immovable like that tree planted by the water. What I love about this verse is it uses the framework of healing for this movement from missing the mark to teshuva. This is not just about repair and accountability, it is about our actual healing of the harm that was brought into this world through our actions. What would it mean to begin our movement towards each other with the foundational understanding that the point, really, is to do our best to heal the harm. What I hear Jeremiah telling us is that being accountable to each other is a huge part of the healing and care work that we do in community. Just like other healing work that we do,it has the possibility of sustaining and nourishing us, keeping ourselves and our communities whole.
Now, we know that healing is different for everyone and the process that one moves through to get the kind of healing they need is subject to change throughout the healing journey. And to be sure, the healing that I am speaking of is that which brings a greater sense of wholeness and liberation, both of which are our birthright. We have inherited a legacy of knowing deep down in our bones that being free in our bodies, minds, and spirits, because we are whole just the way we are, is in fact the truth of who we are, no matter the oppressive forces that try their darndest to impinge upon us. In fact, I believe that because of these oppressive forces, we often forget to access our humanity and dignity when it comes to teshuva. We can lose focus of the healing mechanisms that are available to us to help us make it through the inevitable conflict that arises. 🎶 Loosen, loosen baby. Slow down, child slow down. 🎶 Everything ain't gotta be a fight. But if a fight ensues, know that it doesn't have to stay that way.
שׁ֚וּבוּ בָּנִ֣ים שׁוֹבָבִ֔ים אֶרְפָּ֖ה מְשׁוּבֹתֵיכֶ֑ם
Return, rebellious children, I will heal your rebellion.
Return to the state of being where you are in your dignity. Return to the part of you that allows the divine spark in you to touch the divine spark in those you are in conflict with. Return to what is possible when you lean into what is true about you. Prophet Jeremiah came to remind us that this greater sense of wholeness and liberation is what we are returning to. That is what it means to shuv.
🎶 Healing is possible, may it be so, because shuva is happening, may it be so, and we believe what we need most are the hearts of each other right here. 🎶
Yes, healing is possible through teshuva, but how do we move towards it? How do we maintain it once we touch it? Here's where our medieval ancestors come through.
In his book Hegyon Hanefesh Ha'atzuvah, Meditations of the Sad Soul, Rabbi Abraham bar Chiyya, a 12th-century Spanish philosopher, astrologer, and mathematician, gives us seven ways to understand the root of the word teshuva, shuv שוב.
1. Shuv can mean physically turning from one path or mentally turning from one notion to another, as in Kohelet 12:7:
וְיָשֹׁ֧ב הֶעָפָ֛ר עַל־הָאָ֖רֶץ
And the dust returns to the ground.
Sometimes in the process of teshuva, you need to physically make a change in the situation. Moving the energy can be an important way to get through. Try changing rooms or chairs or clothes or shoes. Maybe you exercise, or simply stretch. If you are inside, move outdoors, or vice versa. Breathe different air. Or as the proof text suggests, return to the earth--sit down, stand upon, grab some dirt--let the adamah be with its beloved adam for some Mother Earth wisdom and balance. We can get stuck in the thick of it and not allow ourselves the space and time to let go of the energy that keeps us from moving towards the healing power of teshuva. Make a shuni, or as Michael Jackson says, you gotta make that change!
2. Shuv can mean reversing or restoring, as in Tehillim 85:2:
רָצִ֣יתָ יְהֹוָ֣ה אַרְצֶ֑ךָ שַׁ֝֗בְתָּ (שבות) [שְׁבִ֣ית] יַעֲקֹֽב׃
HaShem, You will favor Your land, restore Jacob's fortune.
To restore is to regain something that has been lost or taken away. Often when we are in conflict, we lose ourselves in the pain, the grief, and the uncertainty of what will come next. This can lead to what Resmaa Menachem calls "dirty pain," which is the pain of avoidance, blame, or denial that causes us to respond from our most wounded parts. But the good news is that there are ways to regain our dignity and humanity. Our good, flawed selves are capable of acting with "clean pain." Clean pain, Resmaa says, is about choosing integrity over fear. It is about letting go of what is familiar but harmful, finding the best parts of ourselves, and making a leap with no guarantee of safety or praise. But Resmaa makes it clear that this healing does not happen in our heads. It happens in our body. Now is a good time to get clear about when those feelings of trauma and pain are happening now and when they are touching an old, yet fresh wound that is coming up for healing. Restore your connection with your body.
3. Shuv can mean giving, paying, exchanging, as in Melakhim Bet | 2 Kings 3:4:
וּמֵישַׁ֥ע מֶֽלֶךְ־מוֹאָ֖ב הָיָ֣ה נֹקֵ֑ד וְהֵשִׁ֤יב לְמֶֽלֶךְ־יִשְׂרָאֵל֙ מֵאָה־אֶ֣לֶף כָּרִ֔ים וּמֵ֥אָה אֶ֖לֶף אֵילִ֥ים צָֽמֶר׃
Now King Mesha of Moab was a sheep breeder; and he used to pay as tribute to the king of Israel a hundred thousand lambs and the wool of a hundred thousand rams.
Teshuva doesn't have to be a one way street. When we engage in the teshuva process, we have the opportunity to exchange energy, which is exactly what happens when we pay for something. When I am in clean pain mode, exchanging what I am feeling, what I am holding, how what is happening is affecting me, becomes possible. It is not so much of a task as it is a chance to actually engage in giving and receiving. Not only can I give my testimony and maybe even feedback, I can find within me the courage to listen to the testimony and feedback of this other good and flawed human or humans.
4. Shuv can mean resting or dwelling, as in Tehilim 23:6:
אַ֤ךְ ׀ ט֤וֹב וָחֶ֣סֶד יִ֭רְדְּפוּנִי כׇּל־יְמֵ֣י חַיָּ֑י וְשַׁבְתִּ֥י בְּבֵית־יְ֝הֹוָ֗ה לְאֹ֣רֶךְ יָמִֽים׃ {פ}
Only goodness and steadfast love shall pursue me all the days of my life, and I shall dwell in the house of the HaShem for many long years.
One thing that isn't so easy to do when in conflict with others is to stop and dwell, even for a little while. The tendency is to push forward with the help of the anxiety, the adrenaline, and the urgency that is within us. The first thing that Resmaa says that we need to do when we are in this state is to soothe ourselves, to quiet our minds, calm our hearts, and settle our bodies. He goes on to say that this is the part where you quiet your mouth and you don't say anything no matter how much you want to say it.
You just breathe.
You put down anything that you're holding, and you find the internal resource that your body experiences as safe, soothing, or pleasurable.
You. Slow. Things. Down.
This might take a while and that is okay. Imagine that you are giving yourself a little Shabbat where you can just be with what is before you move to the next thing.
5. Shuv can mean cleaving, not turning aside, as in יְשַׁעְיָהוּ Isaiah 57:17:
בַּעֲוֺ֥ן בִּצְע֛וֹ קָצַ֥פְתִּי וְאַכֵּ֖הוּ הַסְתֵּ֣ר וְאֶקְצֹ֑ף וַיֵּ֥לֶךְ שׁוֹבָ֖ב בְּדֶ֥רֶךְ לִבּֽוֹ׃
For their sinful greed I was angry; I struck them and turned away in My wrath. Though stubborn, they follow the way of their hearts.
Teshuva, returning to your best self allows a chance to remain faithful to the truth of our being. We can cling to our values, our principles, and our dignity as they are what gives us the courage and determination to be in right relationship with ourselves and each other. Sometimes in the midst of it all, we can forget that we have them...that is the truth of being human. AND yet, Mishlei | Proverbs 3:13-18 says:
Happy is the person who finds wisdom, The one who attains understanding.
Her value in trade is better than silver, Her yield, greater than gold.
She is more precious than rubies; All of your goods cannot equal her.
In her right hand is the length of days, In her left, riches and honor.
Her ways are pleasant ways, And all her paths, peaceful.
She is a tree of life to those who grasp her, And whoever holds on to her is happy.
What is this wisdom that we are holding onto? Well, in the Torah we have plenty to choose from: We can learn from the lives of Avraham, Sarah, and Hajar, as we did yesterday, from Ya'akov and Esav and of course from our transcestor Yosef and their brothers. The Talmud gives us much to ponder with all of the discussions and disagreements. Who can read the heartbreaking story of Reish Lakish and Rabbi Yochanan and not understand that we are in a long line of humans really needing the healing power of teshuva? But, Baruch HaShem, we also have a legacy of wisdom in the Torah of our lives and in this community. We hold onto these stories, those past and present, learning what to do and most often, what NOT to do.
6. Shuv can mean comfort or dwell in security, as it says in Tehilim 23:3:
נַפְשִׁ֥י יְשׁוֹבֵ֑ב יַֽנְחֵ֥נִי בְמַעְגְּלֵי־צֶ֝֗דֶק לְמַ֣עַן שְׁמֽוֹ׃
She settles my life; It guides me in righteous paths for the sake of Their name.
When we think about teshuva, comfort might not be the first thing that comes to mind, but this, too, is possible as a way into and through the process. What are the ways your mind, body, and spirit are comforted? Is there a song, a movement, a poem, a flower, a scent, a person that you can call to mind or interact with in person that will support you in your return? It is important to know what soothes and settles your body. You are going to need it for that next conflict you find yourself in.
7. Shuv can mean repenting when one misses the mark, as in Hoshea 14:2:
שׁ֚וּבָה יִשְׂרָאֵ֔ל עַ֖ד יְהֹוָ֣ה אֱלֹהֶ֑יךָ כִּ֥י כָשַׁ֖לְתָּ בַּעֲוֺנֶֽךָ׃
Repent, O Israel, to HaShem your God, for you have fallen because of your missing the mark.
Here is the form of teshuva that we would expect. But as Rabbi Ari Lev said yesterday, it is a hard word to translate into English. There are so many ways to understand it. But what I think is important about it is that it's a process. It doesn't just mean saying sorry, or just feeling remorse, or giving back something that was stolen. It involves all of that and more. Which is why I am so excited for these tools our ancestors gifted us, mapping out this process that can often feel overwhelming.
At the end of all of this, you might still be wondering, what the heck is teshuva and how will I do this in the next ten days, the next six or forty-eight years?! What is the ikar, the essence of this practice that we sometimes begrudgingly engage ourselves in?
This is where my teacher and friend Rabbi Danya Ruttenberg comes in. In her new book, On Repentance and Repair: Making Amends in an Unapologetic World, she describes what we are getting ourselves into. She says:
"The work of repentance is often described in terms that place heavy demands on the harmdoer (which is all of us, at different times, in different ways). But that doesn't mean that it can't also be gentle.
"The reason to do repentance work is not because you are BAD BAD BAD until you DO THESE THINGS but because we should care about each other, about taking care of each other, about making sure we're all OK. Taking seriously that I might have hurt you--even inadvertently! even because I wasn't at my best!--is an act of love and care. It is an opportunity to open my heart wider than it has been, to let in more empathy, more curiosity about how my choices or knee-jerk reactions have impacted you, have impacted others. To care about others' perspectives. To let your experience matter, deeply, to me. To look at another person--or a community, or a team of people--and say: Where are you? What are you feeling and experiencing now, and how might I have (even unwittingly) brought you pain or difficulty? And to care about making that as right as I can. It's an act of concern. To face the harm that I caused is an act of profound optimism. It is a choice to grow, to learn, to become someone who is more open and empathetic, who learns."
Teshuva is an act of concern and care that has the ability to heal our wounded souls. To make our communities a place where all of us can live and thrive. We can do this! In the next six years, see if you can identify one thing, one person, one conflict that you are wanting to focus on. Take the time to learn about yourself, understanding which way you want to turn, how you are going to restore your dignity, determining the healthy energy exchanges that will support your process, when and how you will rest throughout, whose wisdom will be your guide, and what are the comforting supports that you will need as you engage in repentance.
In the next forty-eight years, we have a chance to create a Jubilee that will not only release the land and debts, but, through the healing process of teshuva, create a world that is ripe for the liberation, abolition, and justice that we deserve.
May teshuva's healing power bless you, may it protect you, and may it help you know your wholeness.
G'mar Chatima Tovah.
Shanah Tovah.
🎶 Return to me, return to me
With every breath
Return
End and begin with me
With every breathe, return 🎶
🎶 הֲשִׁיבֵנוּ ה' אֵלֶיךָ וְנָשׁוּבָה. חַדֵּשׁ יָמֵינוּ כְּקֶדֶם: 🎶